Church in Chains partner Stefanos Foundation recently organised its latest Trauma Healing Workshop for the widows of violent militant attacks. The five-day residential workshop catered for 41 widows from villages in Bokkos, Riyom and Mangu areas of Plateau state in Nigeria’s Middle Belt region. The attacks on these villages took place on various dates in 2023 and 2024.

Stefanos Foundation has long prioritised caring for widows and orphans in its humanitarian work supporting Christians whose homes, churches and villages are regularly targeted by Muslim Fulani militants. Its rationale in organising Trauma Healing Workshops is described as follows:  “More often than not, attention is given to physical wounds while emotional and psychological wounds remain untreated. Even when psychosocial support is provided, there is often little or no follow-up to address the root causes of the trauma. As a result, many adults return to daily life and encounter triggers that lead to relapse or emotional outbursts. In recognition of this gap, Stefanos Foundation is deliberate about providing follow-up support and designing programmes that address both immediate and long-term needs.

 “Widowhood places women at a disadvantage, and many of these widows are now single-handedly responsible for their households and livelihoods. Unaddressed trauma can lead to various health challenges, erosion of faith, and negative cycles that affect children and the wider society. It also hinders children from becoming healthy, functional members of their communities.”

The workshop was held at a conference centre in a tranquil setting and Mark Lipdo (Stefanos Programme Coordinator) welcomed participants saying, “I stand before you not just as a leader, but as someone who deeply understands the path you are walking. I have experienced the painful loss of my own wife, and it is from this place of empathy that I welcome you. In the midst of heartache, we pray that you will find the Lord close to the broken-hearted. May you experience His comfort, strength, and hope during this time. May this gathering be a sanctuary for your souls and a source of encouragement.”

The workshop followed a structured programme in which participants were divided into groups of six with each group having a leader and secretary to facilitate. A training manual titled “Healing the Wounds of Trauma” provided eleven study topics including:

• If God Loves Us, Why Do We Suffer?
• What Can Help Our Heart Wounds Heal?
• What Happens When Someone Is Grieving?
• How Can We Help Children Who Have Experienced Traumatic Events?
• Bringing Our Pain To The Cross
• How Can We Forgive Others?

“Through this programme, something has shifted inside me”

Participants were encouraged to tell their stories through the use of lament and also art exercises.

One widow, Christina Danjuma, spoke about the death of her husband in an attack by Muslim Fulani militants on their village on Christmas Eve 2023 in which her eldest adult son was also killed. Detailing her ongoing grief and trauma, she said, “I am so thankful for how you called us widows together and nourished us with the Word of God, which truly helps heal our broken hearts. I feel like a child to you all. Even if I try to forgive the Fulani, I don’t know how to move forward because they have destroyed my life. Seeing them laugh at us leaves me completely helpless, but you have truly strengthened us at this gathering.

“May the Lord God bless Stefanos Organisation and the sponsors of this programme. May He fulfil all your desires and open doors for you. And please keep us in your prayers, because facing life entirely alone is incredibly difficult. I have faced so many hardships. Recently, some neighbours even seized my farmland. Over that farm, we have been in constant disputes, and they insult me, knowing full well that if my husband were still alive, no one would dare treat me this way. So please, support me in your prayers, because life has not been easy for me. May the Lord God help us.”

Another widow Patience Kuchai spoke of the effect of her husband’s death in a Fulani attack saying, “The grief hit me like a blow, and I fainted. To this day, the pain has not left me. My husband was buried, and I never got to see his body. Even now, when I pass the graveyard, my heart shatters all over again. But I am sharing this story because of the trauma healing programme. Before this, my heart was consumed by bitter hatred. I used to say I would never forgive the Fulani. I wanted vengeance. But through this programme, something has shifted inside me. It gave me strength to say, ‘God, I thank you.’ This programme changes lives. Through it, I have become human again.”

As the workshop closed Esther Daniel, one of the participants, spoke on behalf of others saying, “Truly, we thank God for this programme. It has been of great benefit to us, to our households, and to our children whom our husbands left behind for us. If it is God’s will, with this programme, everything will change for the better, just as it did for Joseph. Truly, for us women — us widows — is there anyone here who did not enjoy this programme? No, we all did!

“So, what we have learned here, when we go home, let us practise it, and even more than what we heard here. It will help our lives and it will help our children. Our husbands left children behind for us to care for. We are the fathers now; we have the responsibility; we have the duty. If it is God’s will, as widows, everyone should prepare to live well, so that the Lord will be pleased with us. God said He is the husband to the widow and the father to the fatherless. If it is God’s will, from the least to the greatest, God will become our husband and the father to our children, in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

Church in Chains sponsored the Trauma Healing Workshop with a grant of €9,000.